Why not Jimmy Choo?

So today I had a General Paper test in the first two periods to write an essay on 'Do you think the copying nature of human beings is shown by the popularity of fashion and other consumer goods'.. Yeah, basically just bullshit.. and that too in the wee hours of the morning (ok it wasnt 6 but hey 8, 6 same thing, ok). I was so not in the mood of writing a straight-on factual essay so I wrote all the crazy stuff that came in my head, held back nothing.. i think i mentioned manohlo blahniks and gucci too and something about not being colour blind. Then I submitted the paper and warned the teacher that I had become a little 'tired' of the usual strategy and had tried something different.. She started reading it at once and ofcourse I ran downstairs and out of the building. She doesnt have much of a sense of humour.
I feel the strongest urge to write an article listing down all the stereotypes in my school every time im out in the ground. I swear, its like fighting the urge to pee. Okay not really, but kind of. The 'Life is Shit' group is always in clear view, with their bags hanging down their backs, hands in their pockets, frowns etched onto their faces, gazing straight off into the distance, slouching around in their emo-ness. Then there are the 'Wild Animals', the I be sippin' my coffee', the 'corner hogging shameless starers', the 'common room nappers', the 'Illuminati geeks' and oh so many more! i wanna rip them apart and write till my laptop bleeds RAWR. erm excuse me. I think I should go now...   

Luminescent

i don't want to change the order. It holds a story in itself.

Consuming

And i turned around, back in to the now familiar clutches of despair and remorse as your voice vibrated in the moment... It was unexpected and surreal, and left me back in the foggy world where I saw you disappear again and again.. It felt like hours had passed but I could not decide, turn around to face nothing again or walk away extinguishing the glimmer of hope? Im still standing there, immovable, rooted. Why dont I make the decision? because this way, i dont feel anything.. Sometimes you find, its better black and white.

Stop this train?

No I'm not color blind
I know the world is black and white
Try to keep an open mind but...
I just can't sleep on this tonight
Stop this train I want to get off and go home again
I can't take the speed it's moving in
I know I can't
But honestly won't someone stop this train

Don't know how else to say it, don't want to see my parents go
One generation's length away
From fighting life out on my own

Stop this train
I want to get off and go home again
I can't take the speed it's moving in
I know I can't but honestly won't someone stop this train

So scared of getting older
I'm only good at being young
So I play the numbers game to find away to say that life has just begun
Had a talk with my old man
Said help me understand
He said turn 68, you'll renegotiate
Don't stop this train
Don't for a minute change the place you're in
Don't think I couldn't ever understand
I tried my hand
John, honestly we'll never stop this train

See once in a while when it's good
It'll feel like it should
And they're all still around
And you're still safe and sound
And you don't miss a thing
'til you cry when you're driving away in the dark.

Singing stop this train I want to get off and go home again
I can't take this speed it's moving in
I know I can't
Cause now I see I'll never stop this train
(think I got 'em now)


John Mayer is a genie ass. I feel like he took the words out of my mind. The fear of growing older, addressing new reponsibilities, just wondering if you'll ever be able to make it out there in the open.. Makes you wanna go back to being a 8 year old.. back to the tender wilderness of your childhood... where there is no fear and no pain and no feeling of impending doom. Where you aren't afraid of the million possibilities, but excited because of them.. where your parents are this solid backbone to you, healthy and nourishing.. where you dont have a care in the world and you're just psyched to see what the next day brings to you. Where your heart doesnt weigh you down and your mind doesnt feel like its gonna blow. Just contentment. No fear.

Deep sleep

Your eyes speak more than words.. Rooting me to the spot, leaving me clinging on to a flimsy shred of hope.. They spoke volumes, and I felt it all.. Longing, pain, desire, ache.. Intermingled, mixed in the midst of utter confusion... Making me stationary when all I wanted was to run.. Either towards you with wild animal hope and desperation or away from the stinging blows of reliving my worst memories.. Cringing from the pain, trying to hide the scars, the barely healed scars.. But I was a statue and you saw me to the depth of my mind, heart and soul. I felt vulnerable, not because I was scared of you, but because I was afraid you would go away again. And you did. Just leaving behind the memory of your dark, powerful eyes and the linger of a smile in them.. That smile, that spark mocked the fear I felt, rendering it ridiculous that you had ever left. But u had, and the pain will never leave me. But that glimpse of you, the moment you took to wrench my heart out again.. It was good somehow, familiar. I could be a narcissist if pain was all that your presence offered.. And those eyes, brimming with emotion true to the innocence of your soul, I saw them again. And I am thankful.

THIS is how NEW YEAR is supposed to be,

So i don't get what the big deal at New Year is about.. I mean seriously. Are we getting free ice cream? Or like a truckload of Pepsi and chocolates? Oh man I'm totally craving that now! I mean seriously..                      What if New Year was like that?  

The first thing they'd do would be to announce and give out the latest developed everyday use technology such as:   http://www.cracked.com/article_18937_5-things-you-use-every-day-that-are-getting-awesome-upgrades.html?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=fanpage&utm_campaign=new+article  (Cracked = EPICSOME) 

So for like the rest of the year you're enjoying shower help and air conditioned clothes. Now That is a cause for celebration.Okay. So after all of that shit, you play a round of dumb charades and then ice-skate (Tradition Orders You To SKATE) and then finally get served with your choice of favorite meal complete with appetizers, desserts and beverages. Also extra fries. with garlic mayo. or New York fries (omg, how could i not mention them!) Then you get to watch your favorite T.V. show/ movie on a HUGE screen, preferably as awesome a movie as When in Rome (dude, even the ending credits rocked!!) while you chow on MnMs. Also, you can dress up as whatever you want. It can be your comfiest pajamas/ dressiest blouse/ wizard dress robes/ your halloween costume, WHATEVER. It's all up to you. And when you're done, you ride/drive to five star hotels on your choice of cars (Classic Ford Mustang Cobra for me ofcourse) and then sleep in the bestest beds ever. Then you wake up and everything has gone to the shits. Your life is back to normal. Now THAT. is New Year.

Dont ask.

If there's one thing i really really really hate its being blamed for something that i havent done. Yes i might be sounding like a huge crybaby (might? more like must) but I have to admit its one of the things that still makes me cry. Seriously. I mean its hard enough to accept it when u have done something wrong but when I havent, i just so frikking enfuriated... God i feel like Ramona! but no I dont think i can play that card either, im 16 not 6.. Dont u hate it when some little thing like this makes u sad, automatically all the other things that make u sad but u hold them off and stay okay, come back and attack u.. so that it looks like ur being a major crybaby over a teensy little thing.. or maybe i am a crybaby =D i think its easier to just admit that and be at peace with it. I watched Dear John today. its just so lameass how i can never form an opinion about anything. My brother is very right in wondering mera hoga kya =D My G.P teacher already thinks im suicidal! it cant get any better than this right? right?